This is a meditation I wrote a few years back that I found on my computer today and thought you might like to read it.
The Door
Why do we fear the door? Is it because we do not know what is on the other side?
Some of us grew up with game shows as our entertainment, especially when we were at home due to illness. Children and teens who are sick rarely enjoy anything more stimulating than a comic book or a good TV show to help pass the boring hours. The fever stifles enthusiasm for much else. The game shows are there to help fill the void.
"What is behind door number one," the game show host declares with great excitement. As the door opens, ‘oohs’ and ‘ahs’ are heard from the audience. Laughter erupts when the door reveals an unwanted ‘treasure.’ And whether our fever gets better or grows worse that game-day, our minds are impressed with the fact that some doors hide treasures and others reveal unwanted junk. Our young minds dream of winning the shiny, red car, but yet we wonder why someone can be thrilled with a washing machine and refrigerator. We are too immature to understand that a perceived treasure often reveals more about the person who desires it.
Other doors attach themselves in our storehouse of memories. The childhood scary doors that shut us into our bedroom, in the dark, away from those in whom we found comfort and security. The doors that allowed us to escape from threats or to needed privacy to think or feel, often painfully. There were doors of guilt that shut us in with unconfessed sin or hid our messages of shame and failure. There are mental doors we build to protect us from love or from memories of love lost. There are emotional doors we have built deep within ourselves to hide our bruised egos. There are invisible doors that we do not see, but that shut out affection and caring because someone once hurt us with rejection or abuse.
It would do us well to look at our own doors to see of what they are made and why. Sometimes we fear that our very self will crumble if we dare let someone past our protective doors, for when we were too young to erect them or too immature to know we even needed them, we were hurt….or disillusioned…rejected….shamed…ignored. The pain was almost too great to bear, and thus the door-building began. We are good at it now. We quickly size up a relationship and build the appropriate door: one that opens when it is safe, or one that is closed forever.
Some doors seem to be made of steel, and are locked so tight, we cannot open them even if we want to do so. Why have they become such a part of us? To open them might destroy who we are. Others seem to be made of flimsy materials that disintegrate when approached by someone who knows how to make them collapse. "How did they know the weak area?" we ask, when the doors crumble no matter how hard we try to keep it from occurring. Where did they find the key? Is isolation the only respite I have from these threats? But isolation often makes me unavailable even to healthy love.
And there are spiritual doors: some open to vistas that bring great joy, and we cannot begin to understand or express the deep and pleasant feelings that result. But other spiritual doors seem to block out those who would love us in the love of the Lord. Those steal bars are all to easy to construct. And some seem to block out the Lord Himself, the only one who wants us to know what love truly is. We dare not even give Him a key or allow Him access to the inner chambers of our self. The risk seems too great.
There is a ‘spiritual door,’ the path to which strikes terror to our hearts. And because of the frightening path leading up to the door, we often forget the importance of the door itself and what is on the other side. This door was not in the original plan by God, but it does lead to realms of glory we can barely understand or appreciate. This glorious but much misunderstood door is named ‘death.’ It lies at the end of the valley of shadows, and all must walk there one day. Some will travel in an instant through the valley; others will slowly and painfully make their way. Some will lose faith; others will walk so triumphantly that others are encouraged to be faithful. Some will cry; some will sing. Some will be afraid; others will find peace. Some of the young may go before the elders.
But this is a strange door, not like the ones on the game show. This door has two destinations behind it: a blessing and a curse. A grand prize and one to dread. This door of death leads to different journeys beyond it. Perhaps that is why some fear….or scream when approaching it. What do they see that we cannot? Why do some sing and experience peace, and others wail uncontrollably? What do they see? What do we need to know?
For Christians, the door opens to life eternal with their Father and with the One who called Himself ‘the Door.’ For non-believers, the door opens to eternal punishment, apart from all that is good and holy. For these, we must be the ambassador of good news to share with them the true treasures that lie behind the door of death. But what about us believers? What should we remember about the door, and the dreaded path to it?
Life is a game of sorts. Everyday we are asked to make decisions, comparisons, choices. The ultimate choice, of course, is to enter in through the Door Himself. But once we are on the path to life, is there not something else we should keep in mind? Will this path keep us from the dreaded valley of the shadow? No, it does not assure us freedom from pain, suffering, and sorrow. All must travel this path. But we have a companion, and the assurance of One who has traveled that path before us. He promises to accompany us through the valley and to open the door of death for us. Some of us will go quickly through; some of us will go slowly, and will have opportunity to share with our loved-ones. Some of us are allowed to ‘say good-bye,’ and others do not have that blessing. But all of us are traveling toward the door.
The door. Perhaps we should concentrate on the door instead of the dreaded pathway. Perhaps we should ponder what lies ‘behind’ the door, and not what or who we are leaving behind. If we accept the joys that are before us, we can endure patiently as did our Lord. It is normal to fear, to want to hold on to the only life we have known. But the truths have been told us from one Who went through the door and has come back. He let us know that both the path and the door itself are brightly lit when He travels it with us. And He knows what is on the other side: His home.
The door. Concentrate on the door. There is light streaming under it. There are sounds of joy emanating from behind it. There is joy and rejoicing; loved-ones wait with open arms to receive us. The Savior walks beside us, and carries us when we are too weary to walk anymore. The door. I see the door. I welcome the light. I see the Father. The Savior walks with me. There is nothing to fear.
